My Whereabouts

I can't believe it's been a whole full year since my last post wow. To anyone reading this (if there is even anyone lol), hello, I hope you are doing amazing today. It's so hard to convey a year long whereabout in one post but I'll try really hard to summarize where I've been and what I've been doing. If you're reading this, please do try to stay and read everything.d

I was diagnosed with stage 2 papillary thyroid cancer almost a year ago. It was such a scary experience and to be honest, I still don't know if it sunk in yet that I actually /had/ the C word. Yes. Cancer. Never in a million years did I except to get it. You know, you go day to day thinking you'll never get it and then bam, you have it. At first I didn't want to believe it. Like, out of all the serial killers and pedophiles, I'm the one to get cancer. How unfair right? Life is always unfair. To make matters worst than it already is, I was put on the urgent list of surgeries. The cancer was as big as a golf ball. Had radioactive iodine therapy and was given the "based on the result, it is very clear that you have no evidence of any metastasis cancer cells." Cancer free since June 2018. Forever on a Synthroid maintenance.

I also graduated college 2 months ago! I found out I was cancer free the day after my convocation. Anyways, after 5 years of on-and-off relationship with college, I was finally able to graduate. My diagnosis came during my last semester. Honestly, I thought I wouldn't be able make it in time but my lovely professors had helped me so so much! They were so understanding and its quite touching. The one that went above and beyond was my Statistics professor. We had a heart to heart talk about my situation and how he's going to accommodate me, I cried in front of him. All my professors were amazing though.

I also went to a Seventeen concert!!! This was way way back in August 2017. I was contemplating whether to go or save up for Wanna One because duh Minhyun and Seongwoo and Wanna One was going to disband but I fought my own demons and decided to see my bias group. It was such a surreal experience. I will never forget it. Though the organizer was a fail, from not sending the Carat bongs in time and putting huge ass speakers on the left side of the venue so most of us couldn't see the front. I kept moving and the bodyguard might have been pissed so he moved me to VIP instead. I didn't take a lot of photos. I will never understand the concept of just taking photos and videos during concerts to the point you're literally watching it from your phone. I paid 500 bucks for my sister and I, I AM SEEING THEM WITH MY ACTUAL EYES. Here's one of the few photos I took.

I don't have a decent photo because I was screaming and jumping the whole time.

Now you know where I've been and what I did. I was in the hospital most of the time. Getting poked by needles and getting radiation and being unhealthy. I still feel a lot like meeh up until now. My endo told me that sometimes it takes a whole year to adjust my Synthroid medicine to the right dosage so I might feel fatigued and just basically dead tired all the time. I also developed vertigo after getting a biopsy. This is the culprit of why I couldn't attend one of my best friend's funeral. He died a few days before my birthday last year. Died of bone cancer.

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Angry as Hell

It's 2:36 in the morning and I still haven't slept a wink. I'm so afraid that if I sleep, these flies that are flying around in my room will eat me up. There were like 5 of them and I'm so scared it's going to go near me once I turn off my lights. I've only killed one and there's another fly that just flew passed my face and I almost shit my pants. Now that I'm writing about it, I'm getting so itchy and I feel like they're on me. I'm debating whether to sleep in my room or downstairs in the living room. But I'm scared to sleep alone and its downstairs. The struggle is real.

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Rainy Day

Lazy day.

 It rained the whole day today.  I kinda liked it but I also hated it at the same time. I wanted to go out and walk around but thanks to the rain, I got to take a nap. Back when I was little, I used to love napping at the sound of rain droplets. I still love it today, the only difference is that I can't nap because I can't bear to leave my electronics. Sad reality. So I just end up listening to the droplets hitting my window while on the laptop, ipad and my phone.

It was such a lazy day, I didn't do anything productive at all. The biggest accomplishment I did today was to shower to be honest. I hate showering. It gets me all cold and my skin gets dry. Curse you, Canada. Oh and one more thing, I also finished 1/2 of my Woogyu two shot on Asianfanfics. That story has been rotting in my account for a whole year.

Anyways, asides that, I've been fixing my blog as well, trying to look for another layout. I don't know, I like it like this. I don't know why I had the urge to change it. Whatever. I'll probably forget after posting this. I checked the weather and apparently, its supposed to rain the whole day tomorrow as well. I predict another lazy day. It's late and I need to sleep.

And I also need to go and get a job. I'm broke as fuck. 

If only blogging like this earns me a lot of money. Sobs ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

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